What if the bravest thing we can all do is to acknowledge our vulnerability, our imperfections, our sorrows, and decide to lead ourselves forward from our heart anyway? It takes courage to say yes to oneself when we are feeling vulnerable. We are highly encouraged to skip that part of ourselves and to let go of our sensitivity to be able to show up in the world as leaders.
However, I hope you’ll consider a different perspective – one in which you learn to embrace all aspects of yourself with equal respect, curiosity, and inner authority. You do not have to look perfect or grow a thicker skin to feel confident as a leader. You simply break through the noise outside of you and lead with heart from within. You say YES to yourself and break through your own judgments as you choose to trust that all parts of yourself have the power to guide you forward when embraced with love and commitment.
This article is for you if feel the call to show up as yourself with more confidence and in full integrity.
Break Through People’s Barriers by How You Make Them Feel
There is a lot of discussion around building material wealth, obtaining financial freedom, and having power, but what I miss being discussed with honesty and awareness is how leadership in and of itself isn’t a desirable quality unless it is rooted and harnessed purposefully from a place of self-awareness, self-compassion, and a desire to connect.
Many aspiring leaders in business, politics, and corporations are often urged to climb the ladder by toughening up, competing, and obtaining wealth quickly. But true leadership doesn’t spring from superficial appearances; it comes from your inner truth and your ability to influence and inspire—with sensitivity, integrity, and uniqueness.
Real power or the lack of it can be felt by others energetically no matter what you look like or say to them. But you have to be really paying attention and you have to cultivate a relationship with yourself to trust your intuition and be able to show up in alignment.
Confidence or charisma are not qualities you can copy if you do this or that. It’s more about being authentic. We are sold to buy this or that to get the feeling to conjure up a certain feeling. Unfortunately, the effects of that are short-lived. None of that is a good substitute for the true wisdom that lies waiting within each one of us when we choose to cultivate self-knowledge, self-awareness, self-trust, and of course, self-love.
It’s never about looking powerful to others, but feeling comfortable with yourself from within—showing up authentic and passionate about what you believe is important.
Status and making big money are not the only ways in which power shows up, but this seems to be the constant message in almost every powerful institution or person.
Ancient wisdom started long ago pointing us in a different direction, more toward the importance of inner knowing. Socrates’ call to “Know thyself” doesn’t get old. It’s an evergreen invitation to build a life where we connect consciously with others from a place of self-awareness and inner knowing.
In everyday leadership—teachers, parents, politicians—we often see power exercised unconsciously, impulsively, and with disregard to how others are really feeling. Even though we can feel that rubs us the wrong way we still seem to accept hopelessly, as if nothing else and better could be.
Most people won’t really know what I mean because without doing the inner work of self-awareness we can’t really know what we are projecting out there onto the world.
Even if we are oblivious of it, everyone else will be able to pick up on it. A different thing is that they will do something about it. The truth is that takes extra effort and high awareness. Without real inner knowing and the intention to protect what we value, we tend to let negativity eat away our hopes and the responsibility we have to create something better, more worthy of our human potential. Often times we choose to not get involved because we don’t believe we have what it takes.
Sensitivity coming to the rescue of our race and our planet. More and more sensitive people are unable to look the other way. Their sensitivity is there to wake them up, to let them feel the nudge, the discontent, or the complete aversion in order to create something taht will feel better, more expansive, more like freedom. Sensitivity is a great road map to know who you really are and what you really want. I encourage you to listen, to feel, to pay attention because doing the inner work of knowing yourself from the inside out will pay off. It will turn you into a very influential leader. For more on the concept of awakening your inner leader check my article here
As we develop our ability to acknowledge our own beliefs and emotions we can also connect and navigate other people’s too. It opens the door to enriching connections and exchanges of energy and ideas even when disagreement strikes up a nerve.
Your sensitive leadership knows how to deescalate conflict because knows how to make people feel seen and heard. As a result of this people involved feel more at ease and stay opened to what you have to say and building agreements instead of power struggles.
The Audacity to Break Through
Being a sensitive leader is about resiliency. The pressure to conform starts early, as we initially seek belonging with our family, friends, partners, and jobs. Belonging feels safe, but it is not enough if we want to evolve and grow because it doesn’t foster true innovation, growth, or fulfilment for individual needs, cultural gaps, or nations rivalry. Daring Greatly by Brené Brown highlights the importance to be authentic and embrace difficult conversations in order to grow.
Not an easy thing to do though. Anyone of us who has tried to honor their individuality and dare to exhibit beliefs and behaviours that disagreed with the mainstream messages around us, have most likely felt corrected, criticised, questioned, or rejected. As a result of this, we most likely have compromised our true essence and conformed to the standard, to what was expected of us at some point or another in our lives.
It takes real courage and self- leadership to choose to know yourself. In order to commit to finding out what really works for you and makes you feel really alive you have to start with trusting the signals of your sensitivity. They are there to guide you at every step of the journey by honoring you and highlighting your needs. Becoming you is a long journey, a life time one, and at every breakthrough moment in it you will be faced with a calling, a what now moment in which you will be invited to fully show up and decide how you want to share your unique vision with the world. This is when your sensitive self-leadership has been all along preparing you to finally show up for others as a sensitive leader and help them in their own journeys.
Don’t Let Anyone Break Your Vision
Let’s remember that patriarchal influence isn’t gone; it’s alive and kicking as it subtle or implicitly, shapes or expectations, leadership styles, and what is valuable or not. It’s the reason why power often fails to honor sensitivity and empathy as leadership styles. As a sensitive person, sooner or later you will be face to face with a challenging choice: bend to patriarchy to fit in while upholding a system that oppresses and controls you—especially as women—or stand for yourself and dare to imagine a different world?
The job of a leader is always to rebel and dare to imagine ways to break new ground. This is when we find ourselves voicing what others don’t openly say or discuss. True leadership stands for self-love and a deeper understanding of love itself. It starts with you, and it takes courage to accept that responsibility and grow in awareness of the impact you alone have the potential to create—consciously or unconsciously—throughout your life. I say let us choose intentionally what that can be!
Boundaries and self-expression go hand in hand and you will need them to help you getting started on our personal and unique quest for meaning, balance, and your leadership voice.
Boundaries require us to unlearn whatever toxic messages we have learnt from an early age at home, school, culture, media, religion, politics, the beauty industry, so on and so forth.
How we choose to use our time and energy, and who we want to spend it with or not is how we embody our sensitivity with confidence.
It’s not easy because we grow up believing that what seems normal is healthy, and different is not welcome but inconvenient, questioned, and discouraged But how can this be if difference and constant change are what humanity really is about? We are all different and we are constantly evolving in that understanding.
Setting boundaries allow us to find out who we are, believe in, and need.
Setting boundaries allow us to find out how and when we are ready to communicate our truth to the world.
Believing in our constant growth.
Dare to communicate our truth, and learn ways to understand each other.
This is the only way in which we can evolve as a wise human beings.
I hope you understand why I believe claiming your leadership voice is an essential step as a sensitive person. Setting boundaries will be taxing for you as you naturally merge with others’ needs and give generously. Sensitivity is a gift and the best GPS I know to live on purpose but daily self-care practices become indispensable —you’ll burn out, and your health will suffer from sensory overload, guilt, shame, worry, anxiety or depression can easily lodge in your energy field if don’t establish clear boundaries.We need to learn when we draw the line between pleasing others and honoring ourselves.
Boundaries are not just about making decisions that protect our well-being; it’s about creating time and space to develop our leadership voice and decide how we truly want to spend our precious time so we have something to offer to the world.
Entering Conversations with Impact
After we agree that real power is in knowing who we truly are and what we need, the next step is how you are going to show up in alignment, and how you are going to use your value to impact the world.
As sensitive leaders we are at the forefront of a new human-centered leadership. We are attuned to people’s needs and possibilities—and the urgency of transformation for evolution. The world needs more of us visible, speaking up, and driving positive impact as we lead with intent.
There is so much power in coming to terms with the realisation that it is up to each and everyone of us to add value to this world. Nobody can walk your path but you. Life constantly offers us situations where we can choose to see ourselves as victims or agents. What is your life and circumstances trying to bring to your awareness as a sensitive leader? Can you tap into your inner knowing, your unique wisdom and share it with others to mastermind a better world?
Sensitive leaders influence by example. When we commit to bringing about our own healing, others will begin to mirror that—looking within themselves and starting their own healing journeys.
Even if it doesn’t unfold as we wanted it to be, our commitment to our healing will initiate, nonetheless, healing in others. The ripple effect of this will be a whole-hearted, brighter future for humanity.
From Pain to Vision
We shift our trajectory and claim our own healing by tending to the tension between Yin and Yang inside us: reflection and action, receptivity and decisiveness. Discontent points to where the balance is off, guiding us to deepen insight (yin) and take purposeful steps (yang). Our pain becomes the seed for meaning, fulfilment, and impact as we learn to harmonise both forces.
As parents, teachers, and CEOs, when we embody sensitive leadership, others feel safe to be themselves and share their voices to build a shared vision. Only then can we aspire to live together in harmony. Our choice to heal ourselves becomes the true measure of our constructive power over others. We are the catalysts of that change. Becoming our authentic selves is the most effective way to positively influence the evolution of the societal, cultural, religious, and family paradigms we live in today.
TO SUM IT UP
Leading with heart starts with caring for our own hearts and speaking up so our message reaches those who need to hear it.
It also means cultivating boundaries, protecting your energy, and developing a clear inner voice so we are capable of showing up with integrity and influence.
Boundaries will ignite transformation. Ask yourself: Which feelings and stories are mine, and which belong to others? What deserves my time, and what is simply something I do out of obligation?
Based on your answers, practice saying no when necessary and yes to the work that aligns with your values. Think of your YES as Sacred.
Our pain becomes a seed for meaning, fulfilment, and impact when we learn to harmonise the Ying and Yang forces inside of us: reflection and action, receptivity and decisiveness. Discontent points to where this balance is off. Feel it and do something about it. Energy healing practices like Shamanism will balance your energies and clear negative energetic imprints due to trauma and the pain that often comes with growing up.
Closing reflection: I believe Self-love is not a passive sentiment but a practical, revolutionary act that empowers us to lead with purpose, conviction, and care for others.
By aligning our energy with our beliefs, our values, and our actions we can transform teams, organisations, communities, countries, and the world we live in.
Julia Santafé, MA,
Sensitive Leadership Coach & Energy Healing Shaman
